Five years ago today

September 11, 2001 was a significant event in my life. It was an unexpected violation. I was in dental school in the 90's when the Gulf War began. I remember talking to friends about how our generation hadn't lived in a time of war. But even that experience was rather removed - like it didn't realy happen. Acts of aggression were things that happened "over there." Not on our soil. The attacks of September 11 hit closer to home. So even though New York and Pennsylvania and DC are still "over there" with respect to Los Angeles, it still felt very invasive when the jets all hit.

The events of that day are rather surreal in my memory. I remember this undescribable dull roar of background noise like machine hum that I now associate with that day. I woke up that day to the ring of the telephone. Our friend Aaron caught the news and was calling people from our church community to alert them. Clee was the one who answered the phone at about 6:30 AM. I vaguely recall hearing her say "hello," then "WHAT" then "OK," before hanging up the phone. She tersely told me that something happened and we ran out to the TV to find out what. We squatted there in our PJs, not bothering to sit normally. Then we went to wake Lena and Cal up. It was such a strange morning. The four of us sat morosely in front of the TV all morning, not even considering going to work. We knew there was something big going on. By afternoon, we rallied ourselves to shower and eat. By evening, we moved to action. We opened our house to our community and whoever else wanted to come by. Over a three hour time period we had some 40 people come through to mourn with us, weep, and groan and pray for our city, our country, our world.

September 11 was the beginning of a new chapter for me. My life feels different now. One positive thing. I can see the value and the beauty of community. I was so amazed at how the country rallied in support under duress. And I was amazed at how the community I am a part of came together so quickly to pray. But another change lingers. Like many others, I have a sense that there's something happening now that we don't quite understand. It's happening at a profound spiritual level, requiring that I be vigilant and prayerful. And it makes me all the more compassionate for those who don't know the marvel of following Jesus Christ.

So I pray for the families who suffered loss on September 11, 2001 and I pray for this country and this world. And I pray that God would give us more glimpses of the beauty He has brought and will bring out of the ashes of that event.

Clarice