Sending off LenaKim

My former roommate, LenaKim, got married a few weeks ago. It was such a lovely celebration. She cried during the vows, which made me a bit misty. Neither of us really like to cry in public. So now she's LenaKim Robinson. I can't wait to find out how she settles into married life. See, I've lived in 16 different housing arrangements since graduating from high school. Two of those were life changing. Of the 6 other women who shared those times with me, I'm the first to get married. And now Lena. I believe that living the way I did in those two households prepared me for marriage. Now I get to find out how it prepared Lena.

These are the women of my two households on the day I was sent off into the wild world of marriage.


Don't they just radiate peace and joy? The two on the bottom right are Hannah and Julie. I only lived with them for six months, but it was such an amazing time. We met when our church decided to start a summer day camp for the middle school kids in Boston's Chinatown. The summer impacted us so much we decided to move into Chinatown. We thought we could have a bigger impact on the lives of these urban kids if we lived where they did instead of commuting in from the more comfortable areas of the city. We also thought that if we wanted kids to know that God loved them, we should be demonstrating that same love. So an "open door" policy evolved. Kids would just come over after school to hang out... and eat ice cream. And now, eleven years later, when I go back to visit my old church in Boston, I'm known as one of the first residents of 5B. And the response is the same..."ahhhh, yes, 5B (nod of approval)." Hannah still lives there, continuing to serve the kids of Chinatown, and Julie has moved to Thailand to serve the people there. Beyond demonstrating love by creating an inviting home, I experienced love from the other two in the form of generosity. Hannah and Julie believed in my place in that household so strongly that they paid my rent one month when I couldn't afford it and for repayment only asked that I pass on the blessing. They also paid for me to join them for a roommates trip down to Florida over Spring Break. I aspire to embrace that kind of generosity for my life and my marriage.

The other 4 women who stood beside me for my wedding are from my days in the House on 6th. Clee, M, LenaKim, and Cal. I lived there for nearly 4 years. The idea for this household started toward the end of a 2-year period of living alone. I was starting to understand the importance of having a community of people to serve and serve with. I was inspired by how the people of the early church lived and wanted to see if it was possible to live like that today. It turned out that the other "original gangsters" were on the same page. We set out to create a household where we could demonstrate the kind of love that would draw others - where people could feel a sense of community. There was a period of time when we had people over every Sunday to play Settlers of Catan or watch Alias. We had two small groups meeting weekly and one large party per month. It was crazy, but it was such a blessed time of loving people and being loved in return. We also had a few mantras to remind us to take on a mentality of servanthood. "Sacrifice is the context for miracle." That's something our pastor always says. If we want to see miracles, we have to be willing to make sacrifices. "Everyone should try to outserve the other." We didn't have chores. Instead, our goal was to outserve everyone else. It was a win-win situation. Either someone outserved me, and whatever had to be done to maintain the home was done, or I outserved someone else, in which case, I "won" the goal of outserving. We also had an unspoken agreement to right wrongs. Not just to clear the air from conflict, but also that both the "offended" and the "offender" would have opportunities to grow in character. I aspire to expand that kind of servanthood and sacrifice in my life and my marriage.

So now when I go to weddings, I remember my own marriage vows and the women who were a part of preparing me to make those promises. I am thankful to my sisters and I pray that my part in these amazing households could be a part of preparing them for the same lifelong commitment. And I pray for LenaKim Robinson in this amazing time in her life.

Clarice

More pictures of the wedding here